3 A.M.s to hold on to – old poems 2008 iv


3 A.M.s to hold on to

If I…
(Poems that start with “If I…”)
If could save these 3 A.M.s
I’d have more time
If I was asleep
Instead of on the Internet
till dawn
looking at porn
I wouldn’t be so busy with everything else

I like my 3 A.M.s
I hate my 3 A.M.s
But I love my 3 A.M.s
me and the goddess and my credit card number
and video

No, If I saved them up
I’d have more time
for Netflix
Or, uh, read books.




Yet more… American ‘Chinglish!’

Who would have thought it, but yet more badly spelled and funny Englishes I came across while in America.

I should have known finalizing my last post was premature. I can have a bad habit of getting ahead of myself…

If you’re new here, please take note of: this is Chinglish


WP_20140616_001Nice and ghetto, gotta love Long Beach 


WP_20140615_022Father’s Day at Little Tokyo 

  Continue reading

Weekend Chinglish

It’s that time time again. Here are some lovingly-flawed translations for you to enjoy, the unique mix of East and West that results in China’s most treasured of contemporary cultural heritage: Chinglish

Have a good weekend!

Indeed, hasn’t every lady felt that way at times

Ah Baiyun Mountain of GZ, I do love you

Please always consider the life of plants… I knew there was something evil about being a vegetarian Continue reading

Your Weekend Chinglish

It’s not easy writing one’s memoirs, consistently producing something decent to read multiple times a week. What else may I share with some interested readers out there, I asked myself… got me thinkin…

Hence I decided to start a new series: every weekend I will post some of those “Chinglish” pics I like to take from time to time. I have quite the collection. Goes over well elsewhere. What do you think, funny?

If you aren’t aware of the Chinglish phenomenon, here’s the introduction. It is becoming more and more international in modern China, and they like to write signs and menus with English translations. Sometimes they don’t go as planned, and brilliant hilarity ensues. Enjoy.

And no disrespect meant to my Chinese friends. This is a very cool aspect of modern China, the random poetry that comes out of attempts at translation. Most of us expats are saddened when they clean up and replace with these signs with boring good translations. We love Chinglish, it’s great!

Lactating bitches… Who you calling a bitch??

Battle and end of, no water Continue reading